I was channel-surfing one day and stopped on the Maury Show because I saw this guy's face looking really distressed. I wanted to change it immediately after realizing it was The Maury Show, because I don't like the fact they make their living off of making others look stupid. But hey... at least they find out what kids belong to who so there might be some responsibility taken. This man struck me because he looked really genuine, broken, and I sensed a humility about him that is rare to see on these types of shows.
He was there to find out if his 1 year old was his. He told the audience of how he was horrifically burned as a child and told all his life by doctors and family that he would NEVER be able to have kids. His distraught wife said she had never cheated on him or given him any reason to doubt her commitment to their marriage. BUT here they are on this degrading show spilling out their most private thoughts and hidden fears to the world. The man explained his reason for believing this beautiful little boy might belong to another man and how his devoted wife must have cheated on him. His reason was based solely on what the doctors and his family had told him all his life.... that he couldn't. have. kids.
Maury asked the man if he would leave his wife if indeed she cheated and the boy wasn't his. He said "I don't know".
Finally the moment of truth came. The boy WAS his! Overcome with emotion, he hugged his wife in relief. The staff brought out the boy to join them in the moving embrace.
Maury later asked the man AGAIN, "Why did you believe your wife cheated and your son wasn't yours?"
The man replied weeping,
"Because I didn't think I could make ANYTHING like my beautiful son... ANYTHING normal."
What a lie from the pit of hell. I wonder how much that lie had stolen from his life even before then. It almost stole the only thing he said he ever wanted... a family of his own to love and be loved in. That lie almost took THAT FAMILY, THAT HOPE, away from him.
What lies have we been told or have believed about ourselves that have cost us relationships, mental/emotional/spiritual/physical health, self-worth, and purpose. This man almost threw away his family because of a lie not to mention how this lie distorted his view of himself. What power this lie had over him that they would end up on such a show with his wife in question on national tv.
What places have we found ourselves in, what decisions have we made, what people have we given ourselves to, what dreams have we thrown away, what pills have we taken or pits we've fallen into because we have lived out of the lies we have believed.
I felt myself empathizing with that man. Believing lies has cost me much in my life...
BUT JESUS redeems yesterday, today, and forever... THANK GOD!
I have experienced the redeeming power of Christ and I know no matter where you are in life and what lies you have been entangled in, He has the power to break those lies and bring a light to your path that is filled with redemption.
This HOPE is for us as it is for this man.
The TRUTH is a game changer.
Exchange the lies for the TRUTH today.
Live Loved.
Kim Winston Bigler
FREEtheINSIDE
(This entry is dedicated to my boys residing in "The Hole" at the Juvenile Detention Center in Sylmar. Please pray that these kids do not live out the lies but come to know the truth that will set them free.)
Friday, July 22, 2011
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
SELF- DOUBT... GET OUT!
Self-doubt.
Is there anything more miserable in life, more destructive to vision, or more plaguing to creativity?
It is so deceptive. It lies about your abilities. It lies about your worth. It lies about your purpose. And frankly, it hates your guts. Strong? Well, has self-doubt said anything to you that has served you well when you have trusted it's words?
No?
Exactly.
Well, wait a minute Kim. Maybe self-doubt helps me see the reality of things that I need to see, a real perspective for one who may trust TOO much in their own thinking or abilities. Like if I was in a relationship that is not really that healthy but "self-doubt" gives me enough uneasiness that I question my choice in that potential life-long partner. No. That is not self-doubt. That my friend is discernment and they ARE TOTALLY DIFFERENT things. One leads to fear, self-abasement, and paranoia and the other leads to life, trust, and freedom.
Self-doubt is a killer. A killer of dreams. A killer of worth. A killer of purpose. A killer of time. A killer of freedom. A killer of joy. A killer of trusting ANYTHING AND ANYONE... including God.
Discernment is THE truth we need to be listening to. When discernment comes, there is a wisdom that is imparted. The kind of wisdom in the Book of James that is described as pure, peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. Self-doubt doesn't EVER leave a good feeling. Actually, it leaves you feeling confused and crummy. So self-doubt is not true wisdom from heaven, because discernment coming from true wisdom from heaven leaves a mark of peace, every time. A sense of security, every time. A sense of God's love and direction, every time. So let discernment help you determine what plans are God's for your life, because self-doubt is a liar and can't be believed nor followed.
See, God has put a lot inside of me. But self-doubt is always tempting me to distrust that those things will ever see the light of day. And for whatever reason, when I do hear God's voice directing my steps, I am tempted to doubt that THAT voice is even His. Sounds loony. Well, it is. However, I do believe there are certain personal and spiritual barriers we have to overcome that attempt to steal, kill, and destroy the God-given plans that reside within each of us. Physical challenges and self-doubt have been major barriers I have had to overcome. OK, still overcoming. I admire people who just believe. Don't battle this way in their minds. But God has used this personal struggle to encourage others, and I believe the power that God gives me to encourage and inspire comes out of having to walk in victory over this personal struggle myself. I am an encourager, because I have chosen to freely give what I have freely received from God Himself. God is an encourager. Period. I have literally seen self-doubt shipwreck lives. And although it's been a battle, God knows it will NOT shipwreck mine. He is constantly fighting to redeem what self-doubt has wrecked. He wants to redeem those lives and encourage them to believe again. So be encouraged, if self-doubt has stolen much from your life, redemption is always available and you will be amazed of what He can restore!
What is in your heart? What gives you passion? What if you trusted God with your heart and passion? THERE is your purpose... THERE is your path... the very one you were created for.
Now Fly.
And to the Lord be all the glory.
Kim Winston Bigler
FREEtheINSIDE
(this entry is dedicated to those who feel like they've "missed it" due to this killer of dreams... no you haven't and do it... even more extreme.)
Is there anything more miserable in life, more destructive to vision, or more plaguing to creativity?
It is so deceptive. It lies about your abilities. It lies about your worth. It lies about your purpose. And frankly, it hates your guts. Strong? Well, has self-doubt said anything to you that has served you well when you have trusted it's words?
No?
Exactly.
Well, wait a minute Kim. Maybe self-doubt helps me see the reality of things that I need to see, a real perspective for one who may trust TOO much in their own thinking or abilities. Like if I was in a relationship that is not really that healthy but "self-doubt" gives me enough uneasiness that I question my choice in that potential life-long partner. No. That is not self-doubt. That my friend is discernment and they ARE TOTALLY DIFFERENT things. One leads to fear, self-abasement, and paranoia and the other leads to life, trust, and freedom.
Self-doubt is a killer. A killer of dreams. A killer of worth. A killer of purpose. A killer of time. A killer of freedom. A killer of joy. A killer of trusting ANYTHING AND ANYONE... including God.
Discernment is THE truth we need to be listening to. When discernment comes, there is a wisdom that is imparted. The kind of wisdom in the Book of James that is described as pure, peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. Self-doubt doesn't EVER leave a good feeling. Actually, it leaves you feeling confused and crummy. So self-doubt is not true wisdom from heaven, because discernment coming from true wisdom from heaven leaves a mark of peace, every time. A sense of security, every time. A sense of God's love and direction, every time. So let discernment help you determine what plans are God's for your life, because self-doubt is a liar and can't be believed nor followed.
See, God has put a lot inside of me. But self-doubt is always tempting me to distrust that those things will ever see the light of day. And for whatever reason, when I do hear God's voice directing my steps, I am tempted to doubt that THAT voice is even His. Sounds loony. Well, it is. However, I do believe there are certain personal and spiritual barriers we have to overcome that attempt to steal, kill, and destroy the God-given plans that reside within each of us. Physical challenges and self-doubt have been major barriers I have had to overcome. OK, still overcoming. I admire people who just believe. Don't battle this way in their minds. But God has used this personal struggle to encourage others, and I believe the power that God gives me to encourage and inspire comes out of having to walk in victory over this personal struggle myself. I am an encourager, because I have chosen to freely give what I have freely received from God Himself. God is an encourager. Period. I have literally seen self-doubt shipwreck lives. And although it's been a battle, God knows it will NOT shipwreck mine. He is constantly fighting to redeem what self-doubt has wrecked. He wants to redeem those lives and encourage them to believe again. So be encouraged, if self-doubt has stolen much from your life, redemption is always available and you will be amazed of what He can restore!
What is in your heart? What gives you passion? What if you trusted God with your heart and passion? THERE is your purpose... THERE is your path... the very one you were created for.
Now Fly.
And to the Lord be all the glory.
Kim Winston Bigler
FREEtheINSIDE
(this entry is dedicated to those who feel like they've "missed it" due to this killer of dreams... no you haven't and do it... even more extreme.)
Saturday, July 16, 2011
"THE GOD STUFF": A Response To The Annoyed
Be warned. I talk about "the God stuff".
Every now and then someone will make a slightly sarcastic comment on how I or other Christians talk about "the God stuff" a lot.
Well, maybe because we... are... Christians?
If art was at the core of your identity, you would probably talk about art... a. lot.
If baseball was at the core of your identity, you would probably talk about baseball... a. lot.
If dogs were at the core of your identity, you would probably talk about dogs... a. lot. And that would probably aggravate me as much as me talking about God stuff may aggravate others:)
My point is this. God is at the very core of a Christian's identity. We recognize that this most loving Being has given us every single blessing we have ever received here on Earth. We recognize that He has never left us or forsaken us even when others have. We recognize that He carries us when we are weak. We recognize that His Son was given to take our wrongs, shame, and the pain of imperfection so that we might live as free, loved, shame and guilt-free beings. We recognize that He makes a way for us when there seems to be no way at all. We recognize that He is faithful even when we are faithless. We not only recognize these things, we have experienced these things. We have personally experienced the Lord in these ways. So please understand if we talk about Jesus, God, and all "that stuff". It's not because we are trying to be disturbing to anyone. Nah. It's because He is simply our everything. He is at the core of our identity. He is "where" our identity comes. And there is no shame in that.
This God stuff not only CHANGED my life, but SAVED my life. If I talk about God stuff a lot, that is why.
I do not talk about Him to shove Him down anyone's throat or to annoy, but if you ask me why my son is so amazing or how I landed such a loving husband or how I am not the nut-job I used to be before all this God stuff began, the God stuff WILL come up. All these blessings and all this growth have only come from one source and one source ALONE.
Art may be what you DO, but God is who makes you what you are... what you can BE... on the inside... if you let Him.
I guess the only way to TRULY avoid the God stuff is to avoid Christians...
but where's the fun in that:)
Kim Winston Bigler
FREEtheINSIDE
(this entry is dedicated to the annoyed... truce:))
Every now and then someone will make a slightly sarcastic comment on how I or other Christians talk about "the God stuff" a lot.
Well, maybe because we... are... Christians?
If art was at the core of your identity, you would probably talk about art... a. lot.
If baseball was at the core of your identity, you would probably talk about baseball... a. lot.
If dogs were at the core of your identity, you would probably talk about dogs... a. lot. And that would probably aggravate me as much as me talking about God stuff may aggravate others:)
My point is this. God is at the very core of a Christian's identity. We recognize that this most loving Being has given us every single blessing we have ever received here on Earth. We recognize that He has never left us or forsaken us even when others have. We recognize that He carries us when we are weak. We recognize that His Son was given to take our wrongs, shame, and the pain of imperfection so that we might live as free, loved, shame and guilt-free beings. We recognize that He makes a way for us when there seems to be no way at all. We recognize that He is faithful even when we are faithless. We not only recognize these things, we have experienced these things. We have personally experienced the Lord in these ways. So please understand if we talk about Jesus, God, and all "that stuff". It's not because we are trying to be disturbing to anyone. Nah. It's because He is simply our everything. He is at the core of our identity. He is "where" our identity comes. And there is no shame in that.
This God stuff not only CHANGED my life, but SAVED my life. If I talk about God stuff a lot, that is why.
I do not talk about Him to shove Him down anyone's throat or to annoy, but if you ask me why my son is so amazing or how I landed such a loving husband or how I am not the nut-job I used to be before all this God stuff began, the God stuff WILL come up. All these blessings and all this growth have only come from one source and one source ALONE.
Art may be what you DO, but God is who makes you what you are... what you can BE... on the inside... if you let Him.
I guess the only way to TRULY avoid the God stuff is to avoid Christians...
but where's the fun in that:)
Kim Winston Bigler
FREEtheINSIDE
(this entry is dedicated to the annoyed... truce:))
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